The Saddest Eyes

Since we have been home we have spent every weekend driving the hour to my mom's house. There are about a thousand reasons why. One is that she has our Roxy whom I miss like crazy and want to see as much as I possibly can. Another is that she is my Mom and the girls' "Nana" and we just love to be with her. We have also been helping Mom prepare for the sale of my Grandma's house and posessions. So, when we go we are very busy but also very blessed.

It seems utterly ridiculous to me that I can't get out of my mind the look of absolute betrayal on Roxy's face Saturday evening as we left to return to Butte. Mom had scooped her off the floor because it is impossible for me to walk out the door without Roxy glued to my heel. She refuses to be left! So, Saturday, after hugs and kisses all around, it was time to go home. Roxy just sat there in my mom's arms with the saddest and most worried look on her face. She knew I was leaving her - again. It absolutely broke my heart! It is like leaving behind a child every week.

I know that some people probably think I'm crazy to drive all that way just to see my dog, but I can't help it. She just helps me feel a little bit saner and brings some sort of balance and fullness to our life. She loves me without any reservation. She obeys better than my kids (usually). She is loyal in spite of being left every week. And the best part, as any mom can relate to, she doesn't talk back. Well, not usually anyway! And, the girls love her and she loves them. The first night we left her in Manhattan, Laynee realized that she wasn't in the car and was very nearly frantic in her search for her. She must have been sure that I lost her "Lou"! I calmed her by explaining that "Lou" (we call Roxy, Roxy Lou and Laynee can't say Roxy...) was at Nana's house. That seemed acceptable to her :~)

Anyway, I miss my dog even though I know she is being very well cared for and is in the company of all of her canine family. I can't wait to see her!